19 December 2014

Don't Go in the Woods (1981)
83 min.
Directed by James Bryan.
With Jack McClelland, Mary Gail Artz, James P. Hayden, Angie Brown, Ken Carter, David Barth, Laura Trefts, Tom Drury.
Does Don't Go in the Woods rate as the 'Worst Backwoods Horror' ever? We can't commit to it. But it's certainly as bad as you may have heard.

The (ostensible) story: four campers sojourn into the woods for a little weekend rest and relaxation.

Only, they soon discover that there's a hillbilly maniac afoot who enjoys killing pesky folks who invade his turf.

Also known as The Forest 2 (as if the original The Forest wasn't more than enough!), this low budget tedium is poorly scored, haphazardly directed and unevenly paced, to say the least.

Shot in Utah, this features some pretty mountain backdrops, but the scenery alone can't hold this ramshackle pic together.

A cast of *rough* amateurs does the best it can - especially McClelland - but the film's penchant for illogical plotting keeps rising to the surface.

Who are the numerous campers who appear abruptly onscreen, only to be instantly killed?

Why do Peter & Ingrid make it safely to a hospital, only to return to the woods for more carnage?

Who's the guy in the wheelchair, and why is he tooling around alone in the mountains anyway?

Enter this alternate Bizarro universe at your own will.

Best moment: the 'human pinata' scene, where a couple - completely unidentified - are strung up in a sleeping bag and speared by the killer.

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